I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
