I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
