Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
