so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
