I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
