I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
