this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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