I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
