garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
