i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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