i was born a porn star she said
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
