Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Randomize
