All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Randomize
