Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
