So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize