Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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