Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
