Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
