Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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