Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
