Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize