can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
