i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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