Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
