Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
