Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
