There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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