Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize