New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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