If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
