He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
