You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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