I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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