How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
