what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
