it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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