you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize