his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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