What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
