OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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