Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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