i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
