is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
