If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
