Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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