The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
