Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
