I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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