these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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