Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
