it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
