dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
