I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
